I'M CELEBRATING THE END OF 'O' LEVELS!!!!


R.ainval
Professional day-dreamer.
23.02.90
Turning 18 soon.
Pisces.
Emotionally unstable.
Unappreciated.
Yearns for peace.love
Born a singer.
Loves green.tea stuff
Wish to possess the sky.
Crave. for the talent of composing music



Energy's new album
Laptop for poly next year
Learn a new language
IPod 8GB
Huge sunglasses
Bikini-gorgeous body
Open a cafe
Travel around the world
A digital camera
Learn piano
Learn dancing
New tote bag or sling bag
A FABulous bdae celebration next year!
New wallet
Watch movies
Being multi-talented rather than gorgeous XD
Personlised a blogskin full of HEBE!!!
Of course, a guy ^^



; my other blog
; damnphysic
; inseparable
; TAS Youth Voices

; alton
; angel
; angeline koo
; azim
; bernie kok
; boon wei
; charmaine
; chu hui
; chuan whai
; colin chiam
; elaine tan
; grace
; hana
; hazel
; hong wei
; huiyi
; irene wang
; jackson
; jianhui
; joanne ong
; karyan
; kenneth
; liping
; mesgan
; mingyan
; nandhini
; nanjun
; natalie
; pauxian
; peiyen
; qui yi
; ruiwei
; sara
; sean neo
; shu min
; singning
; siying
; steph chan
; suria
; tavin
; vivien
; waner
; wanleng
; xianfeng
; xiang yi
; yeunsee
; yixin
; yoges
; yohannis
; yongliang
; zhanpeng

; felicia chin
; joanne peh
; joanne peh
; sharon au
; bryan wong
; cruz teng
; kelly poon





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Image: PGP!
Brushes: Rebel-heart
Designer: Ebullient*

Where were you when skies were grey
9:50 PM <3

| d r e a m |

I cant understand my emotions.
I cant feel any happiness in whatever i do now.
I only felt anger and disappointment in myself.
I dunno what i live for, how to pursuit my dreams, and how to survive alone...
I felt helpless and weak...
I lost the power of smile and the power of love.
I feel that i am nothing...
I lost myself, lost my senses, lost the ability to think properly...
I wanna sing, sing my heart out...
I feel like only voices could help me up....
I feel relaxed whenever i listen to music...
I can forget my troubles and emotions...
I just hope next year could be a better one....
It's just a small wish of mine...
Just like that...

Where were you when skies were grey
10:50 PM <3

| d r e a m |

Where were you when skies were grey
8:01 PM <3

| d r e a m |

I made this myself leh!
I'm proud of myself and I think this should be the best Christmas present I've received ever!
Although it was from me myself,
the feeling of contentment is very wonderful!
It's like you have put in all your effort
to make something the best that it could ever be...




This is the inner part of the little purse i've made...
The important thing is that I've made it!
No matter how ugly the inside may be,
the outside is nice de!
Notice the 2 trails of thread?
I wanted to make its shape as perfect as possible so
I adjusted the shape by sewing it again!
I've made quite a number of mistakes,
like counting wrong grids and
overlapping the wrong gaps...
But i've tried very hard to mend and modify my mistakes...
so it seemed perfect to your eyes...
but not mine!
Haha..
Luckily i didn't prick myself too hard,
or else i'll bleed!
It's been a long time since i've done cross-stitching...
It's a good thing to be engaged in something when you are rotting at home...
So maybe tml i'll start on the friendship bands!
Give me some moral support!





Looking at this cute and hilarious picture,
I just realised that I am still awake!
I've going to bed late at around 3am almost every night,
for 2 consecutive days!
You'll sure bet that my dark circles are as large as the pandas!
Haha...
Yeah, my dark circles are getting worse...
I haven tried out the aid to dark circles...
( Using sliced apples as eye masks! )
Maybe you can try that too!
I hope the results are good...
But if i go on tormenting myself...
I guess my dark circles will never leave me!
I'm depriving of books to read again!
I dun have a library card and you can expect me
to buy books every week mah...
i'll go broke!
So if anybody who wish to lend me your library card for a long period of time,
please inform me by phone!
Haha.
thank you in advance!

Where were you when skies were grey
1:38 AM <3

| d r e a m |

I found my sunflower art piece!
Haha.
But i guessed i lost my whole folder of art pieces when i cleared my room.
My mum said maybe she had thrown away.
Ahh!!!
My baobei leh!
Haix.....
I've been rotting at home for 2 days!
Doing cross-stitch for the past 5 hours!
Going to be completed...
I'm drinking coffee now so later can finish the rest of the piece...
AHHH!
Tml i'm going to stay at home again!
So sian ah!
Dying liao........
Luckily i'm going out on Saturday to watch Vivien's ballet concert!
Haha.
Nvm, i still can tahan another 2 days...
So till then, I must perserve.

Where were you when skies were grey
9:32 PM <3

| d r e a m |

Where were you when skies were grey
10:22 PM <3

| d r e a m |

Sad.
Lonely christmas for me...
nothing to do on christmas eve.
my sis's happily celebrating with frens!
AHHH!
so unfair!
not to mention about work...
i'm been slacking at home for the past 2 days...
i wonder if i'll feel happier if i'm working today n tml...
DOUBLE PAY leh!!!
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
haix.
tink i gonna stay at home and slack tml!
haha..
SIAN!

Where were you when skies were grey
9:32 PM <3

| d r e a m |

Well, i'm tired of working.
So luckily, there wasn't any work for me yesterday and today.
Went to Melaka yesterday with my family.
Visited my aunt first before going to Melaka.
So long didn't visit her liao, she looked so much older than her age.
Pitied her life of working and raising children.
Went to Melaka around evening and shopped around.
Ate beef noodles and satay celup!
so delicious!
Bet u'll never find anything more delicious than the both dishes in Melaka!
Haha...today?
Had an urge to wash all my old bags,
so i took out 7 bags to wash...
scary bah?
well, it's a tough work washing 7 bags but i did it!
jus realised i used to waste money when i was little.
bleahx!
later i'm going to watch hong xing da jiang le!
yeah!
finally!
haha, but i still wanna earn money leh!
give me work!

Where were you when skies were grey
4:41 PM <3

| d r e a m |

Ya i got my second pay, $208.
2 weeks of standing motionlessly, and this is the reward.
Nice hur, isn't it?
Went out with Wanleng, Liu Zhe, Joanne and Xin Yi and of course Ting Shien..
A p6 class gathering, ended up only 6 ppl gathered.
Quite a fun day out.
Tried to play pool for the very first time!
Didn't know that Wanleng could play so well!
Joanne too!
Ting Shien is a beginner and for goodness' sake, he played quite well too!
Stunned us lah, haha.
Boys usually learn this kind of things faster than girls.
I still cant hold the stick properly lor, aiming also very lan.
Hope to play more of that soon!
After that, 3 ppl gone.
Left me, wanleng and tingshien.
So we decided to drop the plan of watching movie,
and we went to Woodlands Sakae sushi to eat.
Actually it didn't taste as nice, and cost me a bomb!
but i loved mochi!
i think i going to start mochi-cravings le!
found a super oiishi mochi shop at bugis.
1 small little 33g of mochi cost $2.
but i tink it's worth lah..haha.
should have known abt mochi earlier..
i'm such a noob at food...lol
today went to bugis with ah Sem to hunt for Vivien's bdae gift.
Such a hassle to pick gifts...haix...
walked around bugis street for quite a long time and still we cant decide what to buy.
haiyo, i might as well just bake a cake!
haha, more sincere in that way.
Had been spending money on food and transport..
Mum didn't gove me any allowance...
sian...but anyway, spending yr own money hurts lor!
but u can really control the urge to use yr own hard earned money!
that's a good thing!
Christmas is just next week and i have no idea how to spend the day.
haix...

Where were you when skies were grey
12:44 AM <3

| d r e a m |

I'm so surprised that Xin came to look for me after my work!
Haha, but i'm still glad that she rmbs me...=P
We went for dineer and chatted alot lah...
Tok abt work lor...haha
I'm so tired of working...
maybe next week i gonna go shopping!
Haha...so sian, work 2 more weeks and that's it!
I going to hotel work i supposed.
I can work more dyas at hotel rather than standing at shopping centres for2 days a week only.
But that's tiring too...
I love serving people lah...
So i hope hotel is alright for me!
I'm looking forward to my p6 gathering next tuesday!!!
Yeah! Haha.
Christmas is coming, and i tink i'm celebrating with Sem...
Should be lah...
I'm one lonely girl who have no guy n many frens to celebrate christmas with.
Haha.
But i'm contented to have a few good true frens.
That's enough already.
I wanna buy loads of albums and drama sets!!!!
I'm so damn bored staying at home!
I cant even go overseas for holiday....
Sad...
Ppl went to Japan, Genting and Hong Kong.
Me?
In msia and spore.
Ppl said i'm travelling overseas almost everyday.
LOL
What an insult!
Nevermind, i am going to earn loads of money and travel round the world when i grow up!
Haha...
That's all!
Bye=P

Where were you when skies were grey
11:05 PM <3

| d r e a m |

I've spending the whole afternoon watching all my S.H.E vcds and dvds.
Although i cant finish all lah,
i managed to watch all the perfect scenes...
i felt so contented slacking for today!
Haha, u must think i'm mad!
Well, i am thinking to buy all the past albums of S.H.E!
I'm working and getting pay...
But the difficult thing is where to find those past albums...
They may cost a bomb!
Ha, i must jiayou lor!
Jiayou in my work, earning money,
and searching for the old albums!
I'm intending to buy Dou Niu Yao Bu Yao de whole series and soundtrack...
No choice, who ask me to be so in love with Hebe!
She even sang my favourite song!
Xie yi shou ge, write a song (translated in english)
It's in my playlist!
I've been thinking about the past,
when i used to sit in the library with LiuZhe, my old pri schmate...
We used to sing along S.H.E's songs...
our library had stereo sets so she would bring her S.H.E album and we'll sit down and sing along with them...
I dun have much money in the past so i can really afford to buy their albums...
Now i share this love with Hongwei and Yeun See...
Both are S.H.E fans too!
I really missed the past....
But i cant do anything...
Just walk on to the future...

Where were you when skies were grey
8:59 PM <3

| d r e a m |

I have never felt this kind of boredom before in my whole 17 years of life.
It's just insane.
It feels like there's no where u could go or strive for at this point of time.
JC or Poly?
How i know?
Ppl already had their minds set n i'm still wondering where should i go...
This period of time is even more scary than O levels.
I feel empty inside me, like there's nothing to fill it full.
I guess, i really have to take my interests seriously, as in take it as a job or wadeva.
I realised that last year's holidays were alot better apart from the busy christmas carolling...
I got to do wad i like and wad i really loved...
And now?
Standing at shopping centres, serving the customers with enquiries and doubts...
I find it interesting too but not as contented...
I missed singing alot but wad else can i do?
maybe i can go down n see their performances and recall the times i myself singing on stage...
i am lonely, not because i have no one beside me,
but i gave up on my only interest in life....
i lose the chance of standing on stage and sing to the ppl ever again...
i even lose the time to go back to Soka choir to practice and perform with them...
probably for the rest of my life...
i missed the choir ppl and my 2 music teachers....
i missed all the great moments i had in secondary school and the frens i've made there...
moving on to a new chapter in life isn't as easy as i thought...
making new frens and gaining new experiences in another area is a challenge for me.
facing the real world and looking at ppl in a different perspective is what i gained at work...
i must really quit my impatient character and learn to be firm and strong inside me.
there are lots of things i've to learn n bear in the real world...
this is the time i should stand firm and accept the truth.
i have to make decisions that will affect my life and my family...
i will have to be responsible for my own actions and words...
no one else will protect me against the odds and nasty comments that i might get from ppl...
not even my own family...
i'll have to face those myself, alone...
look ahead and never turn back...

Where were you when skies were grey
10:49 AM <3

| d r e a m |

I am sad.
Not because i keep slacking at home,
it's because i realised i never understand how my friends feel.
Whoever passerby is, thank you.
I never try to understand how my friends felt of how i treat them,
never stand in their perspective to look at things,
this lies to my previous relationship too.
I failed to stand at his perspective to see things and understand his feelings.
I'm such a failure when it comes to observation of ppl.
Maybe i should try to learn the skills of observing ppl.
haha.
But sad to say, the art of understanding ppl is difficult.
Maybe i should go to the psychology course at Ngee Ann poly or Temasek poly.
wadeva.

Where were you when skies were grey
9:29 PM <3

| d r e a m |

I've been slacking at home at home for the past few days.
But the feeling isn't that great as i've always thought it is.
I really missed the days at school and choir practices.
I missed the times i went practices for SYF and any other performances.
I still remembered there was once when i was in rehearsal of a certain event,
I sang halfway and i suddenly cant controlled and cried.
I told the teacher cos i hate seeing my seniors graduate,
when the true reason was i was sad when
he cant make it to the performance due to work purposes.
But i still can feel the sadness and craving to see him de feeling at that time.
I missed having lessons and talking craps with my beloved classmates,
missed the times when Ms Tan scolded me for dozing off in class,
and the other teachers gave me a nickname, 'Sleeping Beauty'.
Haha.
Sometimes i feel that school life creates excitement and liveliness in me.
I always loved school until sec3, where schoolwork gets out of my control.
But it's no use regretting now, school life is over and now i'll have to face the real world,
where rivals and competitions are what you would face.
No rest, no true frens, no friendly faces....
I really hate to leave school, to leave the age of childishness, to leave the arms of protection...
But there's nothing i could do to retrieve them back in time again...

Where were you when skies were grey
9:55 PM <3

| d r e a m |

My weekends are exciting and fun!
U might be thinking that i'm crazy,
How can working be fun?
Well, making new friends is really exciting de.
Cool hulks everywhere!
Haha, ok i'm being a carzy-over-guys freako!
maybe i'm in my comfort zone for too long liao,
but i'm still glad to see the world.
Met many great guys during work.
Firstly, Henry who works at Causeway Point de Guardian.
He stays damn near to my house and he even wan me to acc him buy his gf's bdae present!
Funny guy lah, but he's quite a nice person.
One good point abt him is that he always walk beside me where the direction of the cars come,
he siad the cars will knock him first,
and he can push me away.
Some sort of heroic theory of his.
Haha, but that's very thoughtful of him.
Next, Eugene who works for Colgate.
His bdae is the same as u-know-who and he's another stupid lamer.
I asked him a very dumb question and he was totally stunned by it.
What a laugh!
But he's a nice person lah.
Next, Raymond who also works at Guardian.
A quiet Leo who has a cute cute boy look.
He offered me a Ferrero Rocher that Saturday!
Haha, thanks anyway.
Lastly, Weiliang who works for Eye Relax.
He's a damn hardworking guy and humorous.
He lokks quite old, abt 20 plus.
Turned out to be only 18, 3 mths older than me.
Why are guys nowadays looked older than their real age?
haha, i cant never understand.
He's quite a sociable person,
met him for only less than half a day and we had so much things to chat abt.
Great friend =)
Met a 20 yrs old girl yesterday,
she looks younger than her real age.
But she smokes.
I hate it, honestly.
She talked n talked non-stop, and called herself a 'noise pollution'.
Indeed.
Well, it's glad to make more friends!
These are some photos at work, enjoy!





I had nth better to do so took some random shots. hahasXD


Bear with christmas hat! Soooo cute!




Hazel's in love with the bear! Haha ^^

There was a photo-taking session at Cwp with the Disney's characters.
Sleeping beauty, Cinderella and Snow White.


I love Sleeping Beauty, she looked so pretty in that dress!




This is Cinderella, she's got a nice gown too!


This is the host for the event, not very charming as a prince but acceptable lah.


Christmas tree! I always love to take photos of these!







This is Snow White, big one and tiny one!
Cute, isn't it?

Where were you when skies were grey
7:21 PM <3

| d r e a m |